This Worried and Concerned About Your Grandchildren Prayer helps grandparents pray through their worries about their grandchildren.  Common worries and concerns for grandchildren include discipline problems, mental health, behavior problems, upbringing that’s too permissive or too strict,  school problems, divorce and religious education.

These issues are complicated by the fact that as a grandparent you are not the child’s parent or guardian and you must gauge when to speak up about a concern for a grandchild and when to step back.

Worried and Concerned About Your Grandchildren Prayer

Dear God,

I am concerned about my grandchild.

I thank you for the gift of my grandchild.  You tell us in Proverbs 17:6 “Grandchildren are a crown to the aged.”  Thank you for the love they bring into my life.

Here are the joys that I have found in being a grandparent ________________

But having grandchildren can bring worries, too.  Here are some concerns I have about my grandchild _______________

Here are the specific situations, behaviors, things that don’t feel right, incidents or things my grandchild has told me that are causing my concern for my grandchild __________

I ask your wisdom and guidance on handling my worries.  Please speak to my heart, spirit and mind as I meditate on the following questions:

Is this concern for my grandchild something that needs immediate action for the safety of my grandchild such as neglect, abuse, mental health crisis, endangerment, or a threat of harm to themselves or others? __________________

(If this is the case, please contact appropriate authorities as soon as possible.  If your concerns are not a life-threatening emergency, continue in your prayers for guidance.)

God, I ask you to help me prayerfully formulate a plan on how to help my grandchild.

This is how these concerns are affecting my grandchild now or may affect them in the future ________________________

Before I take any action, please help me put things into perspective.  Is this something I should be concerned about?  Guide me to a trusted friend, religious leader or prayer partner I can talk this concern over with (specific name that comes to mind)  _________________________

Is there anything in my own life or past that may be causing me to be hypersensitive, unduly worried, cautious or controlling that is making me more worried than I should be? _______________________________________

I pray for the parents of my grandchild that they will have your wisdom on my grandchild’s needs and how to deal with them.

Here is what I’m praying for the parents _____________________________

Here is what I’m praying for my relationship with the parents___________________________

Here’s something in my experience as a parent myself that helped me in a similar situation _________

If I should say something to the parents, please guide me as to

what to say_______________________

how to say it_________________________________

when to say it___________________

why I’m saying it _____________________________

Please help me to speak the truth in love.

After I speak, help me listen carefully to their response.

If the parents share my concerns, show us how to work together to help my grandchild.

If they don’t share my concerns, help me respect their autonomy as parents while I keep praying until I feel at peace about it or until something changes or they are more receptive.

Strengthen my relationship with my grandchild.  Make our relationship a place safety and nurturing.

Help me be an example of the virtues my grandchild needs.

I pray that my grandchild will develop spiritual curiosity and will grow in their faith and knowledge of you.  Show me what part you want me to play in their spiritual growth _______________

Give me the ability to naturally share about God, faith and prayer with them.  Help their parents to make teaching my grandchild about you a priority at home and also in a church setting.

Strengthen the lines of communication between me and my grandchild.  Open up quality time together and ways we can talk and be in touch when we are miles apart.

May I comfort my grandchild when they are hurting, praise them when they do good things, encourage them when they have doubts and teach them gratitude and thankfulness for everyday blessings.

I end my prayer affirming that you, oh God, love my grandchild more than I do.  You created them in a unique and special way.  You have good plans for their lives.  And you want to see them grow and mature as strong people who trust and love you.

Amen.

Why I wrote this Worried and Concerned About Your Grandchildren Prayer

There are two reasons why I wrote this Concerned about Grandchild Prayer.

Grandparents have many concerns about their grandchildren

I’m the grandparent of four and in talking with other grandparents I have discovered that all of us have things big or small that we find concerning about our grandchildren’s lives.  Recently a grandmother

asked me to pray because her grandson said a few things about the noncustodial parent’s lifestyle that bothered her.  The grandmother had a fragile relationship with the custodial parent, and she wasn’t sure to bring it up to the other parent because she didn’t want to strain that relationship and not be able to see her grandchild.

In another instance, a grandfather who kept his grandchildren for a few days described how he took his preteen grandson to the soccer field and the grandchild wanted to know where his soccer shoes were.  The grandfather told the boy he was big enough to remember to bring them himself.  The grandparent realized that the parents had a pattern of doing everything for their child and the child wasn’t taking any responsibility for his own life.  The grandparent told me, “In the old days, we called that spoiling a child.”

A former school principal was conversing with us and she said that they term this problem “learned dependence” and she saw it first hand when parents rushed to school with homework and projects left at home by a careless child.

And yet another thing many grandparents express concern about is their grandchildren not being taken to church or given religious instruction.

The Power of a Praying Grandparent 

Another motivation to write this article is the power of a praying grandparent.  Often when I ask people to name someone who influenced their prayer life, people say it was their grandparents.  Some observed their grandparents kneeling by their bedside in prayer every night.  Others remember a grandparent praying short prayers with them or reciting bedtime prayers.  Others remember phone calls from grandparents telling them they are praying for them on into the college years.

Grandparents are often experienced intercessors.  As we age, we gain both wisdom and trust in God.  And, since we aren’t able to directly control our grandchild’s upbringing, it causes greater dependence on God and prayer.

The Bible tells us the importance of sharing our faith with all generations.

The Bible says, “We will not hide them from their children, telling to the generation to come the praises of the Lord, and his strength and his wonderful works that he has done.”  Psalm 78:4

And the book of Joel says, “Tell your children about it, and let your children tell their children the next generation.”  Joel 1:3

What the Experts Say To Do When You’re Worried and Concerned About Your Grandchildren

Here are some key things that experts say about concerns for your grandchild:

Get immediate professional help for the following concerns for your grandchild. 

The following are signs that you need to get help for your grandchild right away.

Suspected child abuse, including sexual and physical.

Neglect, which includes parents not providing the basics of food, shelter, safety and adult supervision for your grandchild.

Parental incapacity due to drug addiction, mental illness etc.

Threats of harm to self or others.  This can include a grandchild showing signs of being suicidal, homicidal or violent.

Contact your local department of Children’s or Social Services department.   In some states you can do this anonymously.  In the case of being suicidal, stay with the child while you call the suicide hotline 988  or emergency services 911.

In less life-threatening cases that you feel may need intervention, contact the local school, doctor or your religious leader.

Advice on how to talk to the parents about your concerns for your grandchildren

Experts recommend the following guidelines if you feel you should bring up a concern to the parents.

Use non-threating “I” statements. 

Avoiding “you” statements and substitute them with “I” statements.  Instead of saying, ‘You need to do something about this problem,” try saying, “I was wondering if you’ve ever noticed this problem.”  Or,  “I was wondering what Johnny meant when he told me something recently.”

Ask questions. 

Try asking general observational questions like, “What are other parents doing about this problem?” And then listen to their answers and follow their lead.

Choose a good setting. 

Find a quiet time away from children and distractions.

Speak positively. 

Encourage them by telling them the things they are doing right.   

Respect their boundaries and responsibilities. 

Remember that the parent is an adult.  They are ultimately responsible for their child’s upbringing.  Try to accept and respect this.

Remember times have changed. 

Much has changed in society since you raised children.   Parents today face complex situations like two-income families, cyber bullying, social media influences etc.  Also, the co-parent of your grandchild may have come from a different cultural or family upbringing.  And finally, unless you kept a detailed journal, you may have forgotten the many of your own struggles, mistakes and problems in parenting.

Other Helpful Articles  When You are Worried about Your Grandchildren

Back to School Prayer for Your Grandchildren

Praying for Children and Grandchildren with Problems and Difficulties

Grieving Grandparents Prayer after the Death of a Grandchild

Autistic Child Prayer For God’s Blessings Unlocking Their Potential

Prayer for Adult Children with Problems

Copyright 2024 Karen Barber.  All rights reserved.